Sleeping Apart May be Good for your Marriage

Who would have thought that sleeping apart from your spouse might actually be good for your marriage? I can see that there is some doubt in your mind so let me explain a recent study out of Britain. Poor sleep increases your risk of depression, heart disease, stroke, respiratory failure and increases your risk of divorce and suicidal behavior. A large, Japanese study said that 7 ½ hours of sleep a night is optimal for good health.

Therefore, what do you do if sleeping with your spouse results in poor sleep for you? Two possibilities exist—get a larger bed such as a king size or super king size or sleep in separate room. If you are not bothered by any sleep issues with your partner, then don’t change a thing. However, if you share a small bed and your sleep is interrupted by your spouse’s movement in bed or by his/her exiting in the night for a bathroom break, then consider a larger bed or two separate mattresses put together. If your spouse keeps you awake at night with snoring, loud talking, etc., then perhaps it is time to move to another room.

Only about 8% of those in their 40s and 50s sleep in different rooms while more than 40% of those aged 70+ sleep apart. This could be because long established couples felt more secure about their relationships and bringing up the touchy subject of moving out of the marital bed is easier.

Sleeping apart doesn’t mean that there is no time for cuddling or sex. Both activities require one to be awake so they can be done “prior” to going to sleep—wherever that may be. Intimacy is important for emotional health, but good sleep is important for physical, emotional and mental health. You choose.