Life Changes/Marriage

Life can throw you many curves. Some natural ones like aging, retirement and illness. I guess in a some ways, I have encountered all of them within the last few months. I retired the end of the year and I had some illness to deal with shortly thereafter. Aging is a given!

Perhaps you are wondering what these things have to do with marriage and I will gladly tell you. If you thought that becoming an empty nester caused changes in your marriage and relationship, try retirement. My husband and I now spend practically 24 hours together. We do errands, go out to eat and drive around with the top down (weather permitting). Many told me that I wouldn't be able to stand being around my husband that much; that we would argue and fight. Guess what my friends? So far that hasn't been true.

We have always enjoyed being together and continue to feel that way. I won't guess as to how I will feel a year from now, but I have been pleasantly surprised that we haven't resorted to fights or namecalling. We've grown old together and we are an extension of the same couple we were decades ago. It's kind of like the scenario when you are a nice young lady, you grow up to be a nice old woman too. If you were not so nice as a young lady, you probably can plan on growing up to be a very cranky old woman.

Another thing I experienced recently with my ole man of 45 years, is that he rose to the challenge when he had to help me do things that I couldn't do for myself during an illness. I had to rely on him to serve me and believe me, that wasn't easy for me to get used to. I have been the waitress for years and guess what? He may have not been as fast or efficient as I've been over the years serving him, but when I needed him, he tried his best and I tried to be patient. Afterall, men are not by nature as nurturing as women.

So these past few months of retirement, getting older and being ill have taught me a great deal about my marriage. Being able to count on your partner as life changes and throws you curves is very important. Look at your partner now and ask yourself, can we meet the challenges that life throws us? I hope you too can answer "yes".