Marriage and Children, Must They Go Together?

Back in the old days when I was a kid, children born to a male and female who were not married, was called having children "out of wedlock". Now that expression seems older than I am! Fewer people are getting married than ever and childbearing years have expanded into the 40's. Seems a bit strange that things have turned around so much in the last 20 years.

Does a child need a two-parent home or is it just a luxury like having 5 TVs in one household or giving a cellphone to a 10-year old child? When I see a single mom who has worked all day and then must go home and solely care for children, I can't help but wonder what "quality" time she has left to give to the children. Sure, there are supermoms and superdads, but I believe that they are few and far between.

Freud spoke about the various stages that children go through as they grow into adulthood. At some point in a child's life, they identify with the same sex parent and this parent becomes a role model for their healthy development. How does this happen in a single mom's home with a male child? Yes, they can have another male figure to model after, but is it the same as an old fashioned father who shares a loving home with a mother?

Frankly, I am in a quandry over this. There are many, many well-educated, mentally healthy, successful adults who were raised in a one-parent home. What is the main factor then that is in force in producing such offspring? Have any ideas--please enlighten this old grandma, will ya?